As I watched the new documentary "Fiddler On the Roof: A Miracle of Miracles" at AMC Theater today I had so many thoughts and reflections that have compelled me to write a blog post about it. The original play came to Broadway in 1964 and the movie was released in 1971. The story of Tevya and his daughters has been a theme for the majority of my life.
As I grew up my parents reflected on the importance of traditions and instilled a sense of Judaism throughout the formative years even down to the scene in the show when Tevya rips his shirt and says his daughter is "dead" to him for breaking the tradition of choosing to intermarry. I grew up in a very traditional Jewish home and was told this would happen to me if I inter-dated as a teen. Today this practice has become more acceptable across cultures. (My parents became a bit more relaxed with some traditions as they became grandparents as well)
As I have aged I have come to reflect on different phases of my life in context of this show, first as a daughter, then as a newlywed, as a parent and more recently as a caretaker. (Of note, the show has special meaning to me. Five years ago during the 50th anniversary celebration of my Temple, I helped produce the play while my Mom was inflicted with pancreatic cancer. She was staying with us while I served as her primary caretaker. She loved the show and the themes were a commonality we shared during this difficult time. She encouraged me to continue in my role as producer although I was overwhelmed with her care. Seeing Fiddler was a highlight of her time with me before passing later in the year. I often reflect on the special bond we shared during this time throughout the production.
Although the story focus reflects many family matters, as Tevya's daughters come of age, it is much more. It is about a culture facing the changes in the world, journeying from a more religious background to the newer world of modernity and the battleground for personal freedoms. It takes place in the tiny village of Anatevka, Russia where the community is forced leave their homes during the pogroms in the early 1900s.
Fiddler is much more than this, however, and is very relevant to today's world. We all have Anatevkas in our hearts. It can be an actual or a spiritual place called home. When threatened our lives can be in turmoil and our sense of balance disrupted. Although over 50 years old, the themes are important in context of today's world. This show is a story of refugees fleeing persecution, it is about immigrants being forced to leave their homes. It is the story of accepting individual ideas in a society of long traditions such as the young women, Tevya's daughters standing up for their rights to choose a spouse as opposed to arranged marriage. It is the story of how one can stay grounded in a rapidly changing world. A "Fiddler on the Roof" is a metaphor for this difficult balance.
The documentary highlights the relevance of the story across cultures and religions. It is a story that we can all relate to no matter one's history. The refugees of the early 1900s' became the immigrants of the early years of many of our communities. It is a universal theme and the music and songs have been adapted worldwide. Lin Manuel even performed a version of "To Life" for Vanessa's wedding toast.
I highly recommend seeing this film and hope you will reflect on the important traditions that keep you and your family grounded as we start to approach a new year.
Wendy is a Realtor with Coldwell Banker Needham. She loves reading, theater, cooking, travel, walking her dog and spending time with family and friends. She would love to hear your thoughts on the film.
Friday, September 6, 2019
Thursday, August 29, 2019
Allston Christmas and the Art of Decluttering
This past week we moved my MIL (mother in law) from her single apartment in a private residential Senior Living facility to an insurance qualified care facility. This process of moving has been a continuum of moving from a primary home of fifty plus years to a two bedroom Assisted Living apartment with my FIL to a room in Memory Care and then a single once he passed away. With each move the size of the room and storage space has gotten smaller and smaller and the cost of living higher and higher.
As a realtor, mom and homeowner with three grown kids I see how much stuff we buy and hold on to. As I look at my MIL and her new place I am hit with the reality that time goes by quickly and if one doesn't take responsibility of getting rid of clutter it burdens others. Having gone through this with my own parents in Florida 3 years ago I recognize this burden and don't want to put it on my kids. Although not the primary care person for my in-laws I helped a bit but my SIL shared most of this burden.
I have a basement filled with boxes of stuff that we no longer need or most likely will never use. When I go to a clients home the first thing most need to do is declutter as a step towards getting ready to move. Although many of us are tempted to pack and move things to our next locale it is always best to get rid of as much as possible. In Margareta Magnusson's book The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning. she shares her techniques of carefully and thoughtfully divesting of her things so as not to impose on her offspring.
Millenials get it and every fall there is a local event in Allston called Allston Christmas. Most college students return to the area around September 1 and this is a popular lease term start. Those moving leave their unwanted furnishings out for others to take and repurpose.
For those a bit more settled and in suburbia there are many places where one can discard unwanted items such as Community Councils and Transfer Stations in town. There are also services available to help get rid of the junk. We used GotJunk this past week to dispose of the last remnants of my MIL's home that had made it to each of her prior locations as her new place now includes furniture.
There are many great books out on how to start decluttering and getting rid of things. A recent book I just read by Gretchen Rubin Outer Order, Inner Calm was a great kick start for me to launch a deep purge in my kitchen. I am hoping to continue this process as the colder weather approaches. If you need any further ideas on how to tackle this process feel free to reach out to me. I have a network of professionals who also help facilitate these projects.
Wendy is a Realtor with Coldwell Banker Needham and also works on Cape Cod during the warmer parts of the year. She loves walking her dog, traveling, reading, exercising and keeping up with friends and clients. She also loves coffee and will happily meet anyone interested at a local Starbucks near Needham and Mashpee.
As a realtor, mom and homeowner with three grown kids I see how much stuff we buy and hold on to. As I look at my MIL and her new place I am hit with the reality that time goes by quickly and if one doesn't take responsibility of getting rid of clutter it burdens others. Having gone through this with my own parents in Florida 3 years ago I recognize this burden and don't want to put it on my kids. Although not the primary care person for my in-laws I helped a bit but my SIL shared most of this burden.
I have a basement filled with boxes of stuff that we no longer need or most likely will never use. When I go to a clients home the first thing most need to do is declutter as a step towards getting ready to move. Although many of us are tempted to pack and move things to our next locale it is always best to get rid of as much as possible. In Margareta Magnusson's book The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning. she shares her techniques of carefully and thoughtfully divesting of her things so as not to impose on her offspring.
Millenials get it and every fall there is a local event in Allston called Allston Christmas. Most college students return to the area around September 1 and this is a popular lease term start. Those moving leave their unwanted furnishings out for others to take and repurpose.
For those a bit more settled and in suburbia there are many places where one can discard unwanted items such as Community Councils and Transfer Stations in town. There are also services available to help get rid of the junk. We used GotJunk this past week to dispose of the last remnants of my MIL's home that had made it to each of her prior locations as her new place now includes furniture.
There are many great books out on how to start decluttering and getting rid of things. A recent book I just read by Gretchen Rubin Outer Order, Inner Calm was a great kick start for me to launch a deep purge in my kitchen. I am hoping to continue this process as the colder weather approaches. If you need any further ideas on how to tackle this process feel free to reach out to me. I have a network of professionals who also help facilitate these projects.
Wendy is a Realtor with Coldwell Banker Needham and also works on Cape Cod during the warmer parts of the year. She loves walking her dog, traveling, reading, exercising and keeping up with friends and clients. She also loves coffee and will happily meet anyone interested at a local Starbucks near Needham and Mashpee.
Friday, June 14, 2019
Due Diligence and References Please .........Childcare, Petcare and Eldercare
As a realtor and service provider I build my business totally on referrals. I meet and spend a significant amount of time building a network of trusted service providers and find that the quality of those I refer to are a reflection on me. I am writing this blog to share my perspective on carrying out this same process for hiring for your personal and domestic needs.
I am a strong believer in referrals and would not leave anything or anyone I care about with an unknown stranger. This goes for hiring for both business and personal care. I also believe you generally get what you pay for and there are certain things that are worth the extra price.
Often times one needs outside assistance to help with care for childcare, eldercare or pet care. There was an issue with one company, Care.Com not vetting providers as detailed in the WSJ recently click here. The company was liable for misdemeanors caused by their providers. They had left vetting up to the individuals hiring the caretaker although customers paid this company thinking they were doing the screening. Care.com is redoing their business model. (of note, at time of this blog I heard a new ad for care.com on xm radio saying they do all the vetting of hires for clients but I would still recommend doing your own due diligence....keep reading)
Before leaving a loved person or pet please do your own due diligence. You may be able to get personal references for similiar care needs from neighbors and friends for child and pet care.
It gets more complex with Elder Care as there may be varying levels of physical and health considerations. Depending on the situation it may be worthwhile to speak with a Gerontologist or someone who can help you find the best type of help for the dependants care.
I recently went to a talk about this sponsored by Mature Caregivers They provide a wide array of services for this genre including Care, Management, Dementia Care, and advising on in-home vs care facilities. Situations can change on a dime and plans must allow flexibility to adapt to these changing needs. A fluidity factor should be part of the consideration when looking at long term care planning.
Once you have found a caretaker there are transition steps that will need to be addressed whether it is long term or even a quick overnight stint to allow continuity of base level caring.
I recommend developing a set of questions and define what the proper protocol standards should be to care for your dependent. Make a list of all the tasks you normally undertake and the normal schedule of things such as feedings, walkings, hygiene habit etc. Leave a checklist with the care provider and do a short term test run before leaving the dependent for a longer time period. For example, when my Mom was ill we needed a care provider in her home and I stayed home for the first day to see how she did. I then started to leave for longer stretches of time.
For pets, there are many apps such as Rover to hire a dog sitter. How do you trust leaving a pet with someone on an app? I think it is important to have your pet meet the person first to see how they react to each other. Dogs are smart and often a good judge of character. A recent news report has a few suggestions on how to vet dog walkers, click here. I personally would rather find a dog walker who is reputable by getting personal referrals from friends and neighbors. There are apps such as NextDoor.com where you can get references from nearby neighbors and people you know. (Of note, my dog lets me know who she is comfortable with and I alter who I leave her with if my primary dog-watcher is tied up.)
On a closing note, one can never be too safe so do your homework. Do periodic follow-up once the care provider starts. Don't be afraid to ask for references. It may be advisable to request a CORI check. (I have had to have one done on me for volunteering at a local school). Making a bad choice can often create a fragile situation for both the intended dependent and future care needs.
Be participatory in the care, even when you are not present. You need to have the provider realize he/she needs to be held accountable at all times your dependent is in their care. Suggestions may include checking in on the phone and asking neighbors to keep an eye out for unexpected visitors or noise. It is always better to be safe and precautious.
Wendy is a Realtor with Coldwell Banker Needham. She has an SRES and current is the primary caretaker of her dog, Delilah. She was the primary caretaker for her Mom and has served as a caretaker for her Dad and In-Laws through health and life transitions. She loves to help people and often provides helpful suggestions for each stage of the life cycle.
I am a strong believer in referrals and would not leave anything or anyone I care about with an unknown stranger. This goes for hiring for both business and personal care. I also believe you generally get what you pay for and there are certain things that are worth the extra price.
Often times one needs outside assistance to help with care for childcare, eldercare or pet care. There was an issue with one company, Care.Com not vetting providers as detailed in the WSJ recently click here. The company was liable for misdemeanors caused by their providers. They had left vetting up to the individuals hiring the caretaker although customers paid this company thinking they were doing the screening. Care.com is redoing their business model. (of note, at time of this blog I heard a new ad for care.com on xm radio saying they do all the vetting of hires for clients but I would still recommend doing your own due diligence....keep reading)
Before leaving a loved person or pet please do your own due diligence. You may be able to get personal references for similiar care needs from neighbors and friends for child and pet care.
It gets more complex with Elder Care as there may be varying levels of physical and health considerations. Depending on the situation it may be worthwhile to speak with a Gerontologist or someone who can help you find the best type of help for the dependants care.
I recently went to a talk about this sponsored by Mature Caregivers They provide a wide array of services for this genre including Care, Management, Dementia Care, and advising on in-home vs care facilities. Situations can change on a dime and plans must allow flexibility to adapt to these changing needs. A fluidity factor should be part of the consideration when looking at long term care planning.
Once you have found a caretaker there are transition steps that will need to be addressed whether it is long term or even a quick overnight stint to allow continuity of base level caring.
I recommend developing a set of questions and define what the proper protocol standards should be to care for your dependent. Make a list of all the tasks you normally undertake and the normal schedule of things such as feedings, walkings, hygiene habit etc. Leave a checklist with the care provider and do a short term test run before leaving the dependent for a longer time period. For example, when my Mom was ill we needed a care provider in her home and I stayed home for the first day to see how she did. I then started to leave for longer stretches of time.
For pets, there are many apps such as Rover to hire a dog sitter. How do you trust leaving a pet with someone on an app? I think it is important to have your pet meet the person first to see how they react to each other. Dogs are smart and often a good judge of character. A recent news report has a few suggestions on how to vet dog walkers, click here. I personally would rather find a dog walker who is reputable by getting personal referrals from friends and neighbors. There are apps such as NextDoor.com where you can get references from nearby neighbors and people you know. (Of note, my dog lets me know who she is comfortable with and I alter who I leave her with if my primary dog-watcher is tied up.)
On a closing note, one can never be too safe so do your homework. Do periodic follow-up once the care provider starts. Don't be afraid to ask for references. It may be advisable to request a CORI check. (I have had to have one done on me for volunteering at a local school). Making a bad choice can often create a fragile situation for both the intended dependent and future care needs.
Be participatory in the care, even when you are not present. You need to have the provider realize he/she needs to be held accountable at all times your dependent is in their care. Suggestions may include checking in on the phone and asking neighbors to keep an eye out for unexpected visitors or noise. It is always better to be safe and precautious.
Wendy is a Realtor with Coldwell Banker Needham. She has an SRES and current is the primary caretaker of her dog, Delilah. She was the primary caretaker for her Mom and has served as a caretaker for her Dad and In-Laws through health and life transitions. She loves to help people and often provides helpful suggestions for each stage of the life cycle.
Sunday, June 9, 2019
Travel Tips to Enjoy a "Family Vacation" Locally and Beyond
Just last week I went on an amazing mother daughter trip to Hawaii with my two grown daughters. It was one of the most wonderful times I have ever had and I am forever thankful to my youngest daughter who invited me to join her with my other daughter in celebration of an award she earned from her job.
As I reflect on the week I think one of the most special things was the opportunity to share uninterrupted quality time with my daughters. We live in different states and it is a rare treat for the three of us to be together. We are fortunate to have many of the same interests and vacation expectations. Ahead of time, we planned an itinerary of things we wanted to do. We all had similar food tastes which was also a big factor in our plans as we literally ate our way through Hawaii between the beach, shopping and exercising. Full disclosure however, I was a bit less daring than they were when bike riding down Mt. Halekalia ( full disclosure I rode the brakes most of the way down) or snorkeling at Molakino.
On the front page of today's Boston Globe was an article about the drama and challenges confronting the typical large Family Vacation. I have seen many examples of the behavior mentioned through the years both during large group trips to a destiny or when vacationers have visited my beach house. See my blog from last summer on how to host a perfect vacation visit. I have learned to plan ahead for the most diverse personalities and to best minimize many of the challenges in this article. Once an occasion stress I have learned to mediate this through yoga, meditation, walking my dog and alone time. Equally important is to give each person with me during travels some quiet time.
Well intentioned we all have goals and expectations of how to spend and share our free time. Free time is at a premium these days and different priorities can be understandable to each party involved. I think the key is to recognize each person's personality traits and expectations ahead of the trip. Perhaps the first time a group travels together it is the most challenging as no one knows each others quirks but after this it is definitely in everyones best interest to discuss and outline things ahead of the next trip.
Here are my top suggestions for a successful venture:
1) Identify to expectations and special needs of each party traveling before departure.
2) Have each party member list places/thing they want to see and do and work out a mutually agreeable schedule for things that require planning ahead/reservations. Make a schedule around this for everyone interested with exact times/transportation etc. If the group is large be sure to make dinner reservations in advance. Cross check Open Table and Yelp for recommendations on restaurants. Yelp and Trip Advisor are also great for itinerary planning. In addition you can research ahead of time to plan your itinerary and download City specific guides in areas where you may not have wifi. Use Waze to get around if renting a car.. This a great GPS app.
3) Agree that those who want to be included have to be up and ready to go when needed or can agree to meet up later/make their own plans. Remember not everyone has to do the same things all the time and sometimes it is good to break off for a few hours.
4) Figure out a ways to share common situations.
-Set up a group form of communication, group iPhone chat, whatsapp, fb messenger or whatever works best to be able to reach each other when split off.
-Pool/share/divide expenses at the end of the trip so money doesn't become the focus at each itinerary stop. There is a great app called Splitwise that does the work for you.
-Set up a shared photo album on your phones as surely you will take lots of photos.
5) be willing to compromise occasionally as the purpose of the trip is to bond and have fun.
Smile and enjoy your time together. Quality time is precious and free time is earned.
Wendy is a Realtor with Coldwell Banker Needham. In her free time she loves to travel, walk her dog, blog, exercise and spend time with family.
As I reflect on the week I think one of the most special things was the opportunity to share uninterrupted quality time with my daughters. We live in different states and it is a rare treat for the three of us to be together. We are fortunate to have many of the same interests and vacation expectations. Ahead of time, we planned an itinerary of things we wanted to do. We all had similar food tastes which was also a big factor in our plans as we literally ate our way through Hawaii between the beach, shopping and exercising. Full disclosure however, I was a bit less daring than they were when bike riding down Mt. Halekalia ( full disclosure I rode the brakes most of the way down) or snorkeling at Molakino.
On the front page of today's Boston Globe was an article about the drama and challenges confronting the typical large Family Vacation. I have seen many examples of the behavior mentioned through the years both during large group trips to a destiny or when vacationers have visited my beach house. See my blog from last summer on how to host a perfect vacation visit. I have learned to plan ahead for the most diverse personalities and to best minimize many of the challenges in this article. Once an occasion stress I have learned to mediate this through yoga, meditation, walking my dog and alone time. Equally important is to give each person with me during travels some quiet time.
Well intentioned we all have goals and expectations of how to spend and share our free time. Free time is at a premium these days and different priorities can be understandable to each party involved. I think the key is to recognize each person's personality traits and expectations ahead of the trip. Perhaps the first time a group travels together it is the most challenging as no one knows each others quirks but after this it is definitely in everyones best interest to discuss and outline things ahead of the next trip.
Here are my top suggestions for a successful venture:
1) Identify to expectations and special needs of each party traveling before departure.
2) Have each party member list places/thing they want to see and do and work out a mutually agreeable schedule for things that require planning ahead/reservations. Make a schedule around this for everyone interested with exact times/transportation etc. If the group is large be sure to make dinner reservations in advance. Cross check Open Table and Yelp for recommendations on restaurants. Yelp and Trip Advisor are also great for itinerary planning. In addition you can research ahead of time to plan your itinerary and download City specific guides in areas where you may not have wifi. Use Waze to get around if renting a car.. This a great GPS app.
3) Agree that those who want to be included have to be up and ready to go when needed or can agree to meet up later/make their own plans. Remember not everyone has to do the same things all the time and sometimes it is good to break off for a few hours.
4) Figure out a ways to share common situations.
-Set up a group form of communication, group iPhone chat, whatsapp, fb messenger or whatever works best to be able to reach each other when split off.
-Pool/share/divide expenses at the end of the trip so money doesn't become the focus at each itinerary stop. There is a great app called Splitwise that does the work for you.
-Set up a shared photo album on your phones as surely you will take lots of photos.
5) be willing to compromise occasionally as the purpose of the trip is to bond and have fun.
Smile and enjoy your time together. Quality time is precious and free time is earned.
Wendy is a Realtor with Coldwell Banker Needham. In her free time she loves to travel, walk her dog, blog, exercise and spend time with family.
Tuesday, June 4, 2019
A Good Book, A Good Brew, My Love of Reading and a Podcast
I grew up in a house of books. My Mom loved to read novels and human interest memoirs. My Dad loved history and had a vast collection of non-fiction and reference type books in our home. We were raised to respect books as our best friend.
We were taught to never bend a page or write in the margin. My Dad would never allow us to move a book from his library bookshelf unless it was put back in the exact spot and measured to be an inch away from the ledge in perfect alignment with the other books. It was culture shock when I started college and saw my fellow classmates highlighting text books.
As children, my Mom would regularly bring us to the public library to take out children's books. She was a teacher and thus we were encouraged to read beyond our years. Once I learned to read I was eager to jump ahead a few grades in my reading selections. By the end of first grade I often challenged my teachers to allow me to go to a more advanced section of the school library (4th grade level books).
As I progressed through the years I was reading adult fiction and beyond by junior high. My Dad said I gravitated towards the "trash" books as I loved Harold Robbins and Sydney Sheldon. One favorite that stands out is "A Stone for Danny Fisher" by Harold Robbins.
I didn't enjoy non-fiction at that age because I associated this with reading text books or the stress of my Dad's book placement perfection. I wanted to be free to choose books that I wanted to read and perhaps this limited my progression in enjoying fine literature and history while I progressed through high school and college. At that stage in life this book genre was work for me. I wanted to find myself as I read.
Growing into adulthood, however, I have come to expand my reading interests. Seeing more of the world as an adult has increased my curiosity to a wider range of cultures and peoples. I have come to learn that non-fiction and historic novels teach me more about the real world and have helped to expand my horizons beyond where I physically live. My book wishlist has grown to include many historic novels, memoirs and personal development books.
I now acknowledge the deep influences my parents have had on my life and my reading habits and am excited to share more about this on a new podcast where I am the guest speaker.
I hope you will enjoy listening to this as much as I do. Please let me know and perhaps we can meet at Starbucks for coffee sometime to discuss the podcast and recent books we have read.
Wendy is a Realtor at Coldwell Banker Needham. In her free time she enjoys reading, traveling, walking her dog and theater. She is often reading at her local Starbucks in Needham or Mashpee Commons during the summer months.
We were taught to never bend a page or write in the margin. My Dad would never allow us to move a book from his library bookshelf unless it was put back in the exact spot and measured to be an inch away from the ledge in perfect alignment with the other books. It was culture shock when I started college and saw my fellow classmates highlighting text books.
As children, my Mom would regularly bring us to the public library to take out children's books. She was a teacher and thus we were encouraged to read beyond our years. Once I learned to read I was eager to jump ahead a few grades in my reading selections. By the end of first grade I often challenged my teachers to allow me to go to a more advanced section of the school library (4th grade level books).
As I progressed through the years I was reading adult fiction and beyond by junior high. My Dad said I gravitated towards the "trash" books as I loved Harold Robbins and Sydney Sheldon. One favorite that stands out is "A Stone for Danny Fisher" by Harold Robbins.
I didn't enjoy non-fiction at that age because I associated this with reading text books or the stress of my Dad's book placement perfection. I wanted to be free to choose books that I wanted to read and perhaps this limited my progression in enjoying fine literature and history while I progressed through high school and college. At that stage in life this book genre was work for me. I wanted to find myself as I read.
Growing into adulthood, however, I have come to expand my reading interests. Seeing more of the world as an adult has increased my curiosity to a wider range of cultures and peoples. I have come to learn that non-fiction and historic novels teach me more about the real world and have helped to expand my horizons beyond where I physically live. My book wishlist has grown to include many historic novels, memoirs and personal development books.
I now acknowledge the deep influences my parents have had on my life and my reading habits and am excited to share more about this on a new podcast where I am the guest speaker.
I hope you will enjoy listening to this as much as I do. Please let me know and perhaps we can meet at Starbucks for coffee sometime to discuss the podcast and recent books we have read.
Wendy is a Realtor at Coldwell Banker Needham. In her free time she enjoys reading, traveling, walking her dog and theater. She is often reading at her local Starbucks in Needham or Mashpee Commons during the summer months.
Monday, May 13, 2019
Veteran's Advocacy and Benefits Association
I am proud to have just joined VABA and look forward to helping Military and Veteran families who may need help with a home search on the Cape or Metrowest area. I have a network of affiliated services to help in all aspects of a home sale and/or purchase in both areas and am always looking to build a wider referral base.
I just received this lovely welcome letter that I am sharing. For more information on the resources VABA provides check their website VABA
*********************************************************************************
Welcome to America’s fastest growing Veteran and Military Family Resource.
The VABA (Veteran’s Advocacy and Benefits Association) fights for, serves and connects valuable resources with our Veterans and Military families. We are dedicated to making sure Veterans get the help they need - when they need it.
We are 100% member-driven and member-powered. Our members are Veterans, Military Families, Businesses, Groups, Organizations and Grateful Americans.
Together we are building a community of support so that no Heroes are left behind.
As a Business Member, we encourage you to display the Accredited Member Badge on your website. It is a great way to show our community that you are part of the solution and a Veteran Supporter. Your badge is attached to this email.
Thanks for joining The VABA
I just received this lovely welcome letter that I am sharing. For more information on the resources VABA provides check their website VABA
*********************************************************************************
The VABA (Veteran’s Advocacy and Benefits Association) fights for, serves and connects valuable resources with our Veterans and Military families. We are dedicated to making sure Veterans get the help they need - when they need it.
We are 100% member-driven and member-powered. Our members are Veterans, Military Families, Businesses, Groups, Organizations and Grateful Americans.
Together we are building a community of support so that no Heroes are left behind.
As a Business Member, we encourage you to display the Accredited Member Badge on your website. It is a great way to show our community that you are part of the solution and a Veteran Supporter. Your badge is attached to this email.
Thanks for joining The VABA
Saturday, May 11, 2019
Happy Mothers Day and a Tribute to My Matriarchal Role Models
Recently I was going through some old family photos and was inspired to reflect on the matriarchal side of my family in honor of Mother's Day. I thought I would write a bit about memories I have of these special women who have influenced my life. As of today I can say as far as I am aware I am the oldest living female on this family tree branch. (disclaimer-I am only referring to relatives with direct bloodlines to me).
from left to right, my Mom Audrey, Al, Elaine, Sara Ring, Great grandparents Peter and Rachel Piltch
My great grandmother Rachel came to this country with my grandmother Sara, who was her only child in the early 1920's to escape the pogroms in Kiev. Sara was born in 1912. Rachel's husband, Peter Piltch came several years ahead to set up life in the states and be able to sponsor them. Legend has it that my grandmother and great-grandmother had to hide in the forest with aid of a non-Jewish family until they could escape to the U.S. once they received money to travel. They both entered the country through Ellis Island and to commemorate this we have a plaque dedicated to Rachel. Rachel lived to be over 100 years old and received a letter from President Gerald Ford when she reached this milestone.
We are now onto the next generation and my three kids have grown up and fled the nest. As we celebrate Mother's Day it is a joy to remember the achievements and roles those who came before me played in my life and to see the influence they have played in raising my own family. I am very proud of the persons each of my kids have become. Perhaps sometime in the future, they will become parents and then I would be able to share more on this common journey we all share of Motherhood. Wishing all my readers a Happy Mother's Day.
Wendy is a realtor with Coldwell Banker Needham. She loves to read, blog, walk her dog Delilah, cook and travel. She looks forward to spending vacation time with her family, who are all dispersed from her nest as the summer approaches and will share some special photos on Instagram.
My great grandmother Rachel came to this country with my grandmother Sara, who was her only child in the early 1920's to escape the pogroms in Kiev. Sara was born in 1912. Rachel's husband, Peter Piltch came several years ahead to set up life in the states and be able to sponsor them. Legend has it that my grandmother and great-grandmother had to hide in the forest with aid of a non-Jewish family until they could escape to the U.S. once they received money to travel. They both entered the country through Ellis Island and to commemorate this we have a plaque dedicated to Rachel. Rachel lived to be over 100 years old and received a letter from President Gerald Ford when she reached this milestone.
Sara was an only child and married my Grandfather, Al Ring also known as Abraham, who was born in 1911. Al fell in love with Sara after seeing her photo and they were married at a young age. They had two daughters, my Aunt Elaine Ring(Wolpe) and my Mom, Audrey Ring (Stearns). My grandparents were very forward thinking and my Mom said they were always the role model family influencing choices their friends would make. For example, my grandparents were one of the first to buy a television set but once they did my Mom's friends family's followed. Sara was pretty liberal, unusual for her generation, and allowed her daughters as first generation Americans to live assimilated and modern American lifestyles. They were encouraged to go to college and have careers. They both became independent thinkers and amazing women in their own rights while building beautiful families.
As a child I was extremely close with my Grandmother and Great-grandmother. I would spend weekends at their house in Cambridge where Rachel lived with Al and Sarah until she was close to her late 90s and then had to move to the Hebrew Rehabilitation Center in Roslindale. Rachel was very sharp and warned me about boys before I left for college. She told me to watch out for the ones who said they wanted to come back to my room to study. She said they may really want to do more than study. She was in her 90s at the time of this advise but knew what was going on.
My grandmother Sara was very involved in B'nai B'rith and other civic organizations. I always remember seeing T'zdakah boxes around her house to raise money for charity. In fact I have kept and still use one of her boxes today to donate. Both she and Rachel were very progressive for their ages and adapted well to American life.
Sara was a great cook and baker. Although she brought many recipes from her homeland she mastered the all American dessert and made the BEST apple pie I ever tasted. To this day I am in search of one that is comparable but so far have not had much luck. (I have even tried to recreate it using her rolling pin and recipe).
My Aunt had four boys and my Mom, a girl (me) and a son. Since my Aunt never had a girl, she treated me as her surrogate daughter whenever she came to visit our family from Philadelphia. She taught me many of the finer things in life including a love of reading, cooking, travel, jewelry, bargain hunting for designer clothing, and enjoying casino visits. She was also very involved in local civic organizations and had a voice to be listened too. In many ways she was a large role model and influence on many of the things I enjoy today.
As a child I was extremely close with my Grandmother and Great-grandmother. I would spend weekends at their house in Cambridge where Rachel lived with Al and Sarah until she was close to her late 90s and then had to move to the Hebrew Rehabilitation Center in Roslindale. Rachel was very sharp and warned me about boys before I left for college. She told me to watch out for the ones who said they wanted to come back to my room to study. She said they may really want to do more than study. She was in her 90s at the time of this advise but knew what was going on.
My grandmother Sara was very involved in B'nai B'rith and other civic organizations. I always remember seeing T'zdakah boxes around her house to raise money for charity. In fact I have kept and still use one of her boxes today to donate. Both she and Rachel were very progressive for their ages and adapted well to American life.
Sara was a great cook and baker. Although she brought many recipes from her homeland she mastered the all American dessert and made the BEST apple pie I ever tasted. To this day I am in search of one that is comparable but so far have not had much luck. (I have even tried to recreate it using her rolling pin and recipe).
My Aunt had four boys and my Mom, a girl (me) and a son. Since my Aunt never had a girl, she treated me as her surrogate daughter whenever she came to visit our family from Philadelphia. She taught me many of the finer things in life including a love of reading, cooking, travel, jewelry, bargain hunting for designer clothing, and enjoying casino visits. She was also very involved in local civic organizations and had a voice to be listened too. In many ways she was a large role model and influence on many of the things I enjoy today.
My Mom was an amazing person and role model. She lived a less exotic lifestyle than her sister, was very civic minded and enjoyed the basics of life. She was always happy and instilled in me the love of volunteering and helping people. As such, she was very involved in Humanitarian and Educational organizations throughout my young life and continued this with when she moved to Florida in the early 2000's. She worked as an educator when we were young, was an entrepreneur with my Dad starting a few different business ventures and was always involved in local Jewish life. My Dad also described her as "the eternal optimist" and a "woman of valor". Towards the end of my Dad's life she became his primary caretaker and did everything to make his last years comfortable. At the end of her life she did her best to be independent and take care of herself as well. As her health succumbed to Pancreatic Cancer she was stellar and became a role model of how to be positive and in full control. She taught me a lot as I became her primary care taker in her final days.
Wendy is a realtor with Coldwell Banker Needham. She loves to read, blog, walk her dog Delilah, cook and travel. She looks forward to spending vacation time with her family, who are all dispersed from her nest as the summer approaches and will share some special photos on Instagram.
Tuesday, April 30, 2019
Are You the Primary Care Taker for Your Pet
Pets are an important part of our lives. As a pet owner I admit I love my dog more than most humans (family aside) and she hold a special place in my heart. Reciprocally happy pets love their humans.
It is common for a pet to have one primary human that they look up to for their care and comfort. For an unexplained reason beyond my control this have been my role since we got our Havanese dog, Delilah when she was a puppy almost eleven years ago this coming June. I know this because she follows me around the house and watches every move I make when with her. I also know this because she feels most comfortable walking and doing what she needs to do when I walk her. I sometimes feel that she saves all of her "stuff" for when I get home and walk her.
As a primary caretaker there are important responsibilities when a person or a pet depends on you. Included in my routines are providing food and shelter, grooming, teethbrushing, veterinarian visits and walking. As such I thought I would share some articles regarding pet safety. Last month I blogged about making your home pet friendly and awhile back I wrote about Pet Safety.
In this blog post I will update a few recent articles I have read with ideas on how to be a better primary caretaker of your dog. In today's NYT click here is an article that shares tips on how to be an advocate for your pet and approach a veterinarian visit by preparing 5 recommended questions. Ideally it is always good to be prepared for the visit ahead of time with any concerns you may have.
I recently had my dog's teeth cleaned under anesthesia after much debate and fear. Plaque is a leading cause of heart disease and since she was still in very good shape it was recommended to do the procedure once while she was strong. She had severe plaque and a few teeth that needed attention. It was a nerve racking day for me but fortunately went well. I routinely brush her teeth and the vet actually said although she had 2 small teeth pulled her gums and teeth were in excellent shape. In follow up I researched pet teeth care to keep up her dental health and reduce the chance of plaque coming back. I am sharing an article from the American Veterinary Dental College (AVDC) here.
My favorite time of day is when I come home and walk Delilah. This gives me time to detox from a busy day, spend some quality bonding time and get fresh air. It is always important to be safe when walking your pet and here is an article with some safety tips for your ventures. Of note, on a separate note visibility is important and I do have a side business selling light up dog leashes (click here to learn more). As a matter of fact, the sun is about to come out now and I am going to do just that after I publish this post. Have a great night!!
Wendy is a Realtor with Coldwell Banker Needham covering Metrowest Boston and the Lower Cape. She loves to blog about things near and dear to her including her Havanese Delilah. She recently started sharing short videos of her walks around the local area with Delilah to highlight her market area. You can see these by following her on Instagram or Facebook.
It is common for a pet to have one primary human that they look up to for their care and comfort. For an unexplained reason beyond my control this have been my role since we got our Havanese dog, Delilah when she was a puppy almost eleven years ago this coming June. I know this because she follows me around the house and watches every move I make when with her. I also know this because she feels most comfortable walking and doing what she needs to do when I walk her. I sometimes feel that she saves all of her "stuff" for when I get home and walk her.
As a primary caretaker there are important responsibilities when a person or a pet depends on you. Included in my routines are providing food and shelter, grooming, teethbrushing, veterinarian visits and walking. As such I thought I would share some articles regarding pet safety. Last month I blogged about making your home pet friendly and awhile back I wrote about Pet Safety.
In this blog post I will update a few recent articles I have read with ideas on how to be a better primary caretaker of your dog. In today's NYT click here is an article that shares tips on how to be an advocate for your pet and approach a veterinarian visit by preparing 5 recommended questions. Ideally it is always good to be prepared for the visit ahead of time with any concerns you may have.
I recently had my dog's teeth cleaned under anesthesia after much debate and fear. Plaque is a leading cause of heart disease and since she was still in very good shape it was recommended to do the procedure once while she was strong. She had severe plaque and a few teeth that needed attention. It was a nerve racking day for me but fortunately went well. I routinely brush her teeth and the vet actually said although she had 2 small teeth pulled her gums and teeth were in excellent shape. In follow up I researched pet teeth care to keep up her dental health and reduce the chance of plaque coming back. I am sharing an article from the American Veterinary Dental College (AVDC) here.
My favorite time of day is when I come home and walk Delilah. This gives me time to detox from a busy day, spend some quality bonding time and get fresh air. It is always important to be safe when walking your pet and here is an article with some safety tips for your ventures. Of note, on a separate note visibility is important and I do have a side business selling light up dog leashes (click here to learn more). As a matter of fact, the sun is about to come out now and I am going to do just that after I publish this post. Have a great night!!
Wendy is a Realtor with Coldwell Banker Needham covering Metrowest Boston and the Lower Cape. She loves to blog about things near and dear to her including her Havanese Delilah. She recently started sharing short videos of her walks around the local area with Delilah to highlight her market area. You can see these by following her on Instagram or Facebook.
Monday, April 15, 2019
Pass over the clutter and spring cleaning
As the spring holiday of Passover approaches I always try to clean my home in anticipation of hosting a seder dinner. I got a jump start on my adrenal by helping a family member move to a new apartment in New York, a few weeks ago and this was my primary inspiration to this blog. My next motivation came as I started cleaning my kitchen and found the March issue of Prevention Magazine under piles of mail. One article that popped out was How to Declutter Your Home, One Room at a Time. In this article are simple steps to declutter your home and simplify your life. There are 26 small steps suggested to do one day at a time.
As I approached the move in New York, I had a sudden clutter attack when I entered a room full of "stuff". Although I try to keep accumulated things under control in my own home, this was not the case in this apartment. I was overwhelmed by the amount of stuff that could be passed over (and thrown out) and the importance of getting rid of things as one goes along. After an intense attack session we managed to clear the room out in under 10 hours. See the photos below.
BEFORE PHOTO
AFTER PHOTO
Wendy is a realtor at Coldwell Banker Needham who loves to read, write, walk her dog and work towards a simpler lifestyle. You can visit her blog at www.wendybcb.com.
As I approached the move in New York, I had a sudden clutter attack when I entered a room full of "stuff". Although I try to keep accumulated things under control in my own home, this was not the case in this apartment. I was overwhelmed by the amount of stuff that could be passed over (and thrown out) and the importance of getting rid of things as one goes along. After an intense attack session we managed to clear the room out in under 10 hours. See the photos below.
If you are feeling the declutter vibes there are many great articles and books on this subject. One author who has inspired me is Gretchen Rubin who wrote The Happiness Project . She has a new book out Outer Order, Inner Calm which definitely goes into depth about simplifying life to be calmer. Perhaps you now feel inspired to get a jump start on a cleaning project. If you don't know where to begin you can always hire a professional (I have a network for referrals) but it just takes drive and small steps. You will feel much better as you shed the excess. I wish you a happy and clutter free start to spring holidays and a simplified summer.
Wendy is a realtor at Coldwell Banker Needham who loves to read, write, walk her dog and work towards a simpler lifestyle. You can visit her blog at www.wendybcb.com.
Thursday, April 11, 2019
Happy Home, Happy Pet
After a long day there is nothing as welcoming as a happy and excited dog to greet you. The second I open the front door my dog, Delilah is the first one to run to the door and greet me. This is always the highlight of my day.
Today is National Pet Day and a great reminder that having a pet may have a major impact on one's real estate choices. There is an interesting article in Realtor Magazine this week, highlighting the importance pets play in our lives and how today's home seekers are searching for property options that welcome pets and also have nearby amenities.
My main take away was that when you seek a property as a pet owner there will be new criteria in the final decision. I recommend making a list of all the factors that will be major influencers. As we all worked hard to find ideal environments to possibly raise a family it is now as common to find an ideal environment to have a pet.
If you are buying a single family home be sure there will be safe spaces for your pet to roam and rest. If you are looking at multi-owner buildings you will want to see ones that are pet friendly. Easy ability to get the pet outside for walks will be critical (thinking high rise elevator building may be tough). Check the Condo association rules to be sure pets are allowed in the by-laws. This is very important and do your due diligence. I have heard of stories where one heard a pet was welcome only to later find it went against the Condo Association Rules. If you are renting also be sure the place allows pets. Learn the local area to be sure there are safe places to walk, near by dog parks and reputable veterinarians nearby.
Wendy is a realtor with Coldwell Banker Needham. She loves dogs, travel and blogging. For more info visit her website at www.wendybcb.com.
Of note, I recently started posting short videos called Wendy and Delilah to highlight areas of my real estate market place while we walk around metro west and Cape Cod. These are featured on my real estate facebook page @wendybcb or on youtube at wsbornstein.)
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