Wednesday, August 9, 2017

Butterflies are free-part 2 of The Start of the Empty Empty Nest

When my husband and I first got married my mother in law told me children are like butterflies.  Once they grow their wings they will be set free and go off on their own.  Although she gave me this advise on our wedding day and was referring to the prospect of me taking away her only son,  I profoundly listened to these words and tried my best to always make her feel our presence in her life.  She was very fortunate to have all three of her children remain within proximity to their breeding ground.  Although one ended up moving to western Mass. she often would visit while the other two lived within a 6 mile radius of where they grew up.

In my nuclear family my parents ended up being the ones fleeing their nest when they migrated south to Florida and I was the one who remained behind.  My brother also moved out of state.  Now fast forward to thirty three years later and my butterflies have all spread their wings and moved away.  My husband and I still have our nest however it will officially be empty this week as we soon drive our youngest to New York.

Change has always been hard for me and writing gives me time to put my thoughts down on paper and allows me to find some perspective to my emotions.   Today is the official moving day.  My eyes are watering and I am hopeful to be able to contain my emotions and enjoy the move in.  I will update my blog once it is complete and further reflect on the move.  I find the transitions to always be the hardest for me and once I am on the other side usually do well.

Ironically almost 35 years ago I was the one moving to New York for my first job and my mom moved me into my studio apartment in Forest Hills.  It seems like just yesterday and I remember how excited I was to move to NYC.  At the time the song  New York, New York by Frank Sinatra was my motto.  I had an Internal Audit position with Dun & Bradstreet Corporation on Park Avenue and loved the excitement of being a part of the New York business professional scene.  I worked from headquarters but was able to travel to clients worldwide.  Coincidentally my daughter will have a similar role with a consulting firm located a few blocks from Grand Central and near my location.  In many ways I am excited to relive this stage again vicariously.  I now empathize with how my mother felt when I told her I was excited to move out to an exciting place from Newton.

I was fortunate to have my daughter spend the past month with us on the Cape and we had a lot of fun quality time including beaching, bike riding and watching Game of Thrones.  It was a great month with many packed memories.  We will soon embark on our four hour drive in a well packed car. For me the hardest part will be once it is emptied and then we return to an empty house.

 More to come in a few days.

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